April is the month for humor and we try to take advantage. Our April Fools’ story this year was about a Florida Town that sold itself to a for-profit prison company to become the first prison town in the country. If you haven’t read it yet it’s ABSOLUTELY TRUE, and if you have read it then we hope you got a laugh.
If Florida seems like exactly the kind of state to try for-profit-prison-towns it may be due to the efforts of one Florida character that’s perennially in the news… “Florida Man”. Sometimes he’s a criminal and sometimes he’s just very excitable, but he always seems to be doing something interesting. He’s the only person ever to win multiple Darwin Awards, yet he still seems to be in the running for another one each year. He’s the only superhero who hasn’t had his own movie, so this month we’ll send you to the only place currently chronicling his ongoing adventures. Run, do not walk, to the website “FloridaMan.com” where you can learn the stories behind these and hundreds of other embarrassing and all-too-real headlines…
Drunk, Shirtless Florida Man Shovels Spaghetti into His Mouth at Olive Garden
Florida Man Bonds out of Jail, Then Burglarizes Cars in Jail Parking Lot
Florida Man Fires Gun inside Home, Shatters Toilet
Florida Man Attacks with Razor Blade, Machete in Argument over Squeegee
Florida Man Says He’s ‘Archangel Michael’, Tries to Blow up 16 Government Vehicles
Drunken Florida Man Goes to Jail Because He Wanted Egg Rolls
Florida Man Attacked by Florida Squirrel
Florida Man Pressure Washes His Neighbor
Florida Man Calls 911 After Finding Iguana Swimming in Toilet
Florida Man Steals $33,000 of Rare Coins, Redeems at Coinstar for 30 Dollars
Florida Man Takes Grenade Launcher to Airport
Naked Florida Man Rides Bicycle Backwards on Highway
Florida Man Threatens to Cut off Buttocks with Machete over Potato Chips
Florida Man Says Multiple Syringes Found in Rectum Aren’t His
Florida Man Says Aliens Have Landed, Burns down House Stocked with Flamethrowers and Ammo
Florida Man Driving Car Full of Stolen Mail Crashes into Trailer Full of Alpacas