It’s hard to tell if that sound you hear is George Orwell turning over in his grave or laughing his head off. A hyper-conservative group is fixing God’s mistakes in the Bible by rewriting the whole thing to fit Conservative doctrine. And that’s just the start.
Run, do not walk, to http://www.conservapedia.com/Main_Page, where you will encounter… Conservapedia. Andy Schafly, son of Phyllis, started Conservapedia to fight the liberal bias in places like Wikipedia and the rest of Western Civilization. The Bible Retranslation Project is just one of their activities. The whole thing is propaganda in the worst tradition of Pravda, but you’ll get unending hours of jaw-dropping entertainment as you surf through the 33,784 pages in this Conservative view of the world. A few choice bits to get you started…
Here’s a translation example from the Bible Retranslation Project (also called the Conservative Bible Project):
The King James version of Luke 11:53-4 reads:
“And as he [Jesus] said these things unto them, the scribes and the Pharisees began to urge him vehemently, and to provoke him to speak of many things, laying wait for him, and seeking to catch something out of his mouth, that they might accuse him.”
I’m sure we can all agree on the obvious liberal bias there, but the new translation (done by Andy himself) makes it safe for everyone:
“As Jesus told them off, the scribes and Pharisees furiously interrogated Him about everything, plotting and seeking to quote Him for a politically incorrect remark to use against Him”
Or here’s a good one from the Guidelines page for article submissions. The first guideline says “Unlike Wikipedia, we do not block for ideological reasons.” Then, just three lines further down, we find that “…argument without end, on points contrary to the Conservapedia philosophy” is a reason for blocking!
Or try this one… http://www.conservapedia.com/Best_of_the_public
Or this one… http://www.conservapedia.com/Essay:Best_New_Conservative_Terms
Or this one… http://www.conservapedia.com/Evolution
Everywhere you turn in Conservapedia is like that. Just pick a random page, and you’ll be rewarded with a terrifying glimpse into the yawning gap that passes for thought in the conservative movement. Enjoy!
